Updated: Jan 2
Week three is in the books and the standings have never been tighter. This week is an example of why every team in this league has a shot at being the champ. The standings are completely different from a week ago as we have a new number one team at the top as well as some new faces in the top half of the standings. Let’s take a look at which teams took a step forward and which ones stumbled this past week.
The Dirty Sanchez (1-2) V.S. Annexation of Puerto Rico (3-0) *(Game of the Week) *
The weeks featured matchup lived up to the hype and was decided by just 3.41 points showing why it deserved to be the game of the week. It was the undefeated Annexation of Puerto Rico inching out the win with a final score of 184.26 to 180.85. The AOPR were led in scoring by Patty Mahomes (42.46), Phillip Lindsay (30.0), and Julio Jones (28.8). The Dirty Sanchez was able to keep it close with Matt Ryan (35.65), Mark Ingram (36.50), and Green Bay’s defense (22). It was supposed to be the battle between the top 2 QB’s in the league but Friday Sanchez traded Lamar Jackson away and acquired Carson Wentz and Devonta Freeman to gain that running back depth they needed and Freeman gave him 14.50 points which were his highest numbers this season. The Annexation (3-0) are headed to their second straight Game of the Week as they take on Division rival and fellow undefeated Harry Ballsackies (3-0) in a battle for first place. The Dirty Sanchez (1-2) looks to get right when they take on the winless Lick My Antonio Brown-Eye (0-3) in week four.
Little Italy (2-1) V.S. Beavers Love Wood (1-2)
The Beavers have arrived as they not only handed Little Italy its first loss of the season but completely obliterated the former first place team with this week’s top scoring offense. The Beavers won with a score of 207.58 to 165.60. The Beavers were led in scoring by Russell Wilson who completed exploded with a 53.98 point outing. Darren Waller (28.10) and Cooper Kupp (35.20) also added to the top score of the season. Little Italy’s line up was hit prior to Sunday when it was announced Friday that the Patriots were letting Antonio Brown walk. Italy foreseen this coming so made a move to acquire AJ Green via trade but he is still weeks away from contributing. That wasn’t the only trade as they also acquired Lamar Jackson while letting Carson Wentz and Devonta Freeman go. Lamar’s (27.10), Dalvin Cooks (23.30), and Tyler Lockett’s (37.40) was nice but were no match for the Beavers. The Beavers (1-2) will now turn their attention to the sputtering SlamHogs (1-2). Little Italy will look to turn things around this week when they take on Richard Feltersnatch (1-2) who will also be looking to rebound.
Harry Ballsackies (3-0) V.S. Lick My Antonio Brown-Eye (0-3)
The undefeated Harry Ballsackies did as they were projected to do and that is hand the Brown Eye its 13th straight loss. They did so with a score of 188 to 153.13. Harry was led to victory by strong performances by Keenan Allen (46.60), Alvin Kamara (38.10), and Tom Brady (31.20). The buzz kill of the day for Ballsackies was the quad injury to wide out T.Y Hilton who may be forced to miss some time moving forward. The Brown Eye was led in a losing effort by Deshaun Watson (39.93), DJ Chark (19.60), and Leonard Fournette (18.20). This season is quickly coming off the rails for the Brown Eye who had such high hopes coming into the season. Top draft pick Davante Adams has disappointed and severely underperformed thus far. Also Melvin Gordon still holding out is also hurting this team. They will look to snap this historic losing streak when they take on The Dirty Sanchez Butt-Fumblers (1-2) this week. Harry Ballsackies (3-0) finds itself in another featured matchup as they will Battle Division Rival and fellow undefeated Annexation of Puerto Rico (3-0) where the winner will be the last unbeaten team.
The SlamHogs (1-2) V.S. Cocoa Nuts (2-1)
The SlamHogs looked to rebound after their week two loss as they took on defending champ Cocoa Nuts, but they were no match for the champ. Cocoa Nuts completely dismantled the Hogs in this 2018 semi-final rematch by a score of 188.23 to 134.92. The SlamHogs season is quickly spiraling out of control as their team was in the bottom scoring for the second straight week. Their top scorers were Adam Thielen (21.6), Josh Gordon (16.4), and Bears Defense (31). Top draft picks James Conner and Zeke Elliott continue to disappoint for the Hogs and need to start performing as top picks. The Cocoa Nuts were not plagued by any underperformers as 31+ point performances from McCaffrey and Rivers as well as Sterling Shepard’s (29.10) propelled the champ to victory. Cocoa Nuts (2-1) will take on My Ditka Got Your Gurley Off (1-2) in week four. The SlamHogs (1-2) will look to stop the bleeding as they take on this week’s top scorer The Beavers Love Wood (1-2) next week.
Richard Feltersnatch (1-2) V.S. My Ditka Got Your Gurley Off (1-2)
This Battle came down to Monday Night Football and it was My Ditka getting their first win of the year by a score of 167.69 to 165.88. My Ditka was led in scoring from strong performances by Jameis Winston (31.59), Jags Defense (27), and Joe Mixon (18.50). Feltersnatch had a unbelievable performance from Mike Evans as he exploded for 53 fantasy points. Greg Olsen chipped in with 26 points and Aaron Rodgers also gave him 20.08 points. Richards Feltersnatch no only lost the matchup but it appears they have also lost star running back S. Barkley for the next 6 to 8 weeks with a high ankle sprain. Richard Feltersnatch (1-2) will look to overcome the injury and loss this coming week as they take on Little Italy (2-1) who’s coming off their first loss of the season. My Ditka (1-2) looks to stay hot as they go to war with the defending champ Cocoa Nuts (2-1) next week in a key divisional matchup.
STANDINGS AFTER WEEK 3
(STANDINGS DETERMINED BY WINS, VICTORY POINTS, DIV. WINS, H2H,TOTAL POINTS)
1.) HARRY BALLSACKIES (3-0)
2.) ANNEXATION OF PUERTO RICO (3-0)
3.) COCOA NUTS (2-1)
4.) LITTLE ITALY (2-1)
5.) DIRTY SANCHEZ BUTT-FUMBLERS (1-2)
6.) BEAVERS LOVE WOOD (1-2)
7.) RICHARD FELTERSNATCH (1-2)
8.) SLAMHOGS (1-2)
9.) MY DITKA GOT YOUR GURLEY OFF (1-2)
10.) LICK MY ANTONIO BROWN-EYE (0-3)
Harry Ballsackies +2
Cocoa Nuts +1
Took Step Back
Little Italy -3